Categories: Gettin The Mind Right

3 Steps to Optimism

Happy Monday!

Do you ever lie to yourself?

I do sometimes. Not in a sense of  “I didn’t do/say that,” but through self-rationalization.

We keep telling ourselves stories that serve our as our explanations to justify why certain things in our lives are the way they are.

Often these stories use words and phrases like:

“I can’t…”

“Here we go again.”

“This always happens to me…”

I don’t know what to do…”

“This just doesn’t work for me…”

“I did everything I could do.”

Behind the stories we tell ourselves is a protective resistance that surrounds the edge of our comfort zone, preventing us from doing XYZ.

It’s hard to overcome this protective resistance because it happens naturally, often subconsciously, without us ever knowing.  Our brains way of “protecting” us in an attempt to keep us inside our comfort zone because what we want, XYZ, is unknown territory.

Because this happens subconsciously, the only way we can explain this is through self-justification.

The irony is that life is growth – everything in existence (whether human or plants) is either growing (or dying). And the only way to grow is to venture into the unknown, out of your comfort zone.

Think about babies. Babies learn to crawl, then they learn to walk. They fall a lot along the way but they always keep trying.

Compare that to an adult. When it comes to fitness, when most people don’t achieve their goal right away, they stop.

It is important to note that baby’s level of protective resistance is much less than ours because they’re innocent and unaware of what could happen.

So, how do we as stubborn adults, jaded by the world and past “failures” overcome a subconscious mechanism that builds resistance around what we want? We must deliberately choose and focus on optimism.

3 Steps To Optimism

  1. Become More Self-Aware. – Either you decide right now that you are taking charge of your life or that you are going to keep telling yourself the same story. Question yourself daily – are your behaviors mapping the outcome you want to achieve? If not, why not – what story are you telling yourself?
  1. Go on the Offensive! – Relating to football, sure you can score on defense–but if that’s your only plan of attack and you play it safe, you will get blown out every game.This time of year I like to visit rehabilitation centers (nursing homes) in an attempt to provide some joy. Do you think the people who are coming close to the end of their existence wished they played safer or went after what they want? Do you want to wallow in regret, never knowing and always wondering what you could have accomplished (whether fitness/nutrition/professional/parental)? Or do you want to know you went for it?


  1. Learn to Love the Process. – You cannot work out and eat clean for 3 months and expect to have the body of your dreams for the rest of your life. Well actually let me correct that, you can expect that but you will be miserable and stuck in story land.

Every day is a struggle, some days worse than others. Not just for you, but for me and every other “fitness pro” “model” – EVERYONE.

I’m a very motivated person – no one needs to tell me to work out, clean up after myself or work; but sometimes it can get very tough as an entrepreneur.

Sometimes I need motivation and recently I found “The Gary V. Audio Experience” podcast provided that reinforcement I need, speaking to the struggles of being an entrepreneur. I read Gary’s first book back in 2009, and while I found good content, like most books I found the message just faded.

The podcast medium is different, though.  As busy as I am, I am in the car anyway so there’s no reason why I can’t listen to it as I drive.

And after 4+ months of planning, I am VERY excited to announce I am launching “Fat Radio” at the end of this month! It will be a podcast designed for busy people like you, to fuel you with optimism and to help motivate & inspire you through the daily struggles of trying to eat clean, feel good (inside and out) and workout.

It will be a free download you can listen to anytime you want!

My mission with this podcast is to coach, educate, entertain, inspire and motivate you every day to help make the daily grind easier for you. I’ll be sharing more details over the next few weeks!

Let’s not kid ourselves, every day is grind.

Remember, give yourself a break. You’re doing the best you can with the resources you have.

Take a few minutes to reflect and follow these 3 steps towards optimism as its something we need more now, than ever before.


Have you been searching for the best whole-body workout in all of Connecticut? Look no further–it’s here at m.e.l.t. studios!  Try our M30 workout FREE — just send us an email at and we will hook you up with an amazing workout at one of our studios in Glastonbury, South Windsor, and West Hartford!

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