Categories: Gettin The Mind Right

Procrastination and Fear

Happy Monday!

 

The root of procrastination is fear. We can claim we are too busy but the truth is we are afraid.

 

Sometimes it’s not physical fear or even fear of doing the thing it’s self, but rather fear of the impact of what we want to do or need to do on something else in our lives as every action has a domino effect.

 

Inaction has a domino effect, too. Inaction due to procrastination obviously doesn’t get us what we want or get things done. But there’s additional collateral damage from inaction. If something continually appears into our conscious mind, then there is a good reason. This “thing” is attached to one of our highest values in some way and will continue to occupy our very limited space until acted on.

 

For me personally, I am afraid of snakes. It’s a common fear, but I attribute it to a Saturday morning WWF wrestling show where Jake “The Snake” Roberts had his snake bite Macho Man.  That sounds silly, right?  Well, YouTube it. The biting part was not fake! And no, wrestling wasn’t bad for my early development; I attribute part of my love for fitness from wanting to have the same musculature as those super stars.

 

In any event: I’m a grown-ass 32 year old man who is afraid of snakes! While I do get fears like everyone else, I typically act on them or address them. But this was something I hadn’t addressed and it started to bother me.

 

In January I made a declaration I was going to hold a snake. 5 months later, it hadn’t happened. I kept telling myself I was busy (which I am) but ultimately it was a story — an excuse that “justified” my procrastination.

 

Finally I decided enough was enough. As a coach dedicated to helping YOU grow, I could no longer continue telling you to face your fears while avoiding my own.

 

And so I linked up with a client at the Busch Wild Life Sanctuary and her colleague Amy to make this happen. Amy was amazing; she answered my questions and facilitated making the process as comfortable way as it could be for me.

  • I literally went weak in the knees.
  • I became very passive — something I am not.
  • My voice cracked.
  • It felt very uncomfortable.

 

Here’s what I learned:

 

1).  If something in your mind will not go away, you must face it or else it will hold you back. You need to free yourself of whatever it is. Along these lines, you too might be afraid of snakes but if it’s not constantly coming up in your head, then there’s no reason to address it.But whatever it is that won’t go away — that is what YOU need to face.

 

 

2).  Be clear with your expectations: After this encounter I had a weird feeling. On one hand I was psyched that I faced my fear. But on the other hand, I was still uncomfortable during the encounter and still have a fear of snakes. I then realized my goal wasn’t to be Joe “The Snake” Carabase, but to simply hold a snake. Mission accomplished–I WON!!

 

Sometimes when reach a goal our ego points out everything that didn’t happen and we feel start to feel like crap. Be absolutely clear (and reasonable!) about what you want to accomplish so that you can enjoy your win without reservation!

 

 

3).  Don’t judge the outcome: Even after taking time out of my schedule (as well as Amy & Lisa’s busy days!) and after declaring on social media what I would do–even after all of that, there was still a part of me that just did NOT want to go through with it. But you know what? Even if I hadn’t, it would have been progress. To show up, to be in a room with a snake, to stand within reach of that writhing, curious snake — that is PROGRESS!

 

Sometimes we confuse progress with outcomes. Whatever it is you are working on, keep score of EVERY small win you make. Allow the outcome to give you a direction, but focus on the small yet critical steps you take each day.

 

 

What is it that you need to do — to overcome so you can move forward?

 

#meltmonday
#meltmindset

JC

ILLUSTRATION via: JC

 

 

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