Categories: Gettin The Mind Right

What's Your Inner Story?

Happy Monday!

Are you ready to let go of your Inner Story?

 

You have a voice inside that can keep you from being happy…and that voice is your ego/small self who is dialed into your anxieties & fears more than anyone else. That voice is on autopilot, narrating your life.

 

There’s an old cliché, “Everyone has a story” which refers to the diverse backgrounds & experiences each of us have. Everyone also has an inner story that dictates what we think about who we are/are not and therefore have a say in what we do or don’t do.

 

Often, the ego has been replaying these stories for us for so long, we no longer know what is actually real because we’re looking through a lens of limiting perceptions. It’s no longer about reality but rather your perspective from your self-limiting beliefs.

 

And here’s the crazy part: we are addicted to these stories!

 

Your Inner Story: The Good and the Bad

We can be addicted to our inner story because even while it might be limiting, it provided a false sense of comfort for so long. For example, for some people it’s “safer” to stay on the couch & eat chips than it is to hire a trainer and get healthy—because what if they “fail,” or what if someone judges them, or what if they succeed? Fear of success is a real thing.

 

Other times, we are addicted to our stories because they’ve helped us find success in other aspects of our life. This gets tricky as we can wrongly associate our identity with our story, whether good or bad…but the truth is, while its true you are who you are, very few of us ever get to really explore what that means. I believe that each of us has amazing potential and incredible uniqueness but that it’s only found in our higher self—our nonjudgmental, loving self.

 

We live too much of our lives in our heads, judging ourselves for every little thing we do, working from our own limiting inner stories.

 

The other night, I found myself rushing through the airport for a delayed flight. I was at security, moving furiously to put everything in bins; my lap top, Buddha’s food, my sardines, my shoes. Then a man behind me gently said: “It’s okay man, no rush” or something to that effect.

 

In that instant, it was like he somehow bent time and space and put a calming, supportive hand on the shoulder of my 10 year old self; the child who was so bullied and so insecure that he feared getting yelled at any time he did something in the public eye.

 

My ego built this “Go-Go-Go!” inner story in an effort to repair my damaged inner child. If I went as hard and fast as possible, I wouldn’t bother anyone and I would be enough. This false security has caused me to rush so much throughout my life and often miss the moments right in front of me (which create its own issues, but that’s another post).

 

Yet here’s the flip side: the “Go-Go-Go!” inner story also helped me be the man I am today and achieve the level of success I’ve found to this point! From pioneering the 30 Minute Workout in the fitness industry and creating multiple successful brands and gyms to writing books and being on reality shows and directly or indirectly helping literally tens of thousands of people…

 

Whoa…

 

It instantly became clear that no matter how much effort I’ve put towards putting aside my perfectionism and slowing down, I still struggle with many of the same issues–because I am addicted to this inner story.

 

Let Go of Your Inner Story

How can I possibly let go of the inner story that has helped me AND so many other people?

 

The answer is not to completely change from the core of who I am–nor is it to ignore this realization. The answer is to identify the moments when I let my ego to narrate my life, and then step in: “OH–what’s up buddy? I see you, but we’re good.”

 

The answer is to simply observe my thoughts and behavior, instead of actively judging and criticizing myself.

 

As a coach, I’ve helped people for almost 15 years now. I couldn’t understand why some people wouldn’t do what they knew they should, or why they fixated on what they were not instead of appreciating all their hard work. But now I know it’s because of the story they told themselves that was left to its own devices for far too long.

 

It’s time for all of us to take back the pen and control our own narrative. Take back control–with love and appreciation–because ultimately your ego created that story in your best interest and that story still has value.

 

Just don’t expect that you will regain control overnight.

 

Observe your thoughts with no judgement and ask questions like “Why am I thinking this? Where did that belief come from?”  Regain control of your inner story: slow down your brain, meditate, and keep a journal to record your thoughts to help you clearly identify what is going on.

 

Feel free to forward this to anyone you think could benefit from it.

#meltmonday
#meltmindset

JC

 

 

ILLUSTRATION via: hubpages

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