Categories: Gettin The Mind Right

How to Overcome Fear

Happy Monday!

When we stop being afraid of fear, we notice it’s just a feeling.― David R Hawkins


How many instances, when you are fearful of an experience, does the fear turn out to be worse than the experience itself?


Certainly we all have been in situations where we were nervous & scared, and it lived up to or even surpassed those feelings. But if we were to take a closer look back into the psyche leading up to the event, it’s likely we ourselves exacerbated that negative outcome.


There is strong evidence to support that the extent we allow the fear to dominate determines the type of outcome we have. If you are fully focused on the fear of how bad something will be, you basically convince yourself that no matter what, it will be a negative experience. When you cannot overcome fear, you close yourself off from any positive outcomes.


More times than not, the fear we feel inside is far worse than reality. New experiences can be a bit uncomfortable. But the more we dislike and fear change, the more we make the experience a negative one.


New Stimulus + Challenge = Growth

New stimulus and challenges are not negative–they are necessary for personal growth.  It’s very similar to resistance training. Using challenging weight and/or reps provides a new stimulus to your body, which is why you feel resistance. If you decide it’s too hard after one rep and you stop, you won’t grow muscle. And we know that increasing weight/reps is the only way you will grow muscle.


How often do we stop doing something when it gets uncomfortable? Even worse, how often do we say NO to the chance to do something new or bold or explore new possibilities, because we are too scared to even try?


I think we can all agree that you cannot live your best life–physically, mentally, or spiritually– if you cannot overcome fear. Most negative emotions are rooted in fear. So if we know discomfort is good for us and leads to growth, why do we often find ourselves stuck in fear?


The “Shadow”

One of the big obstacles to our emotional development is the fear of what lies deep in our subconscious.


Swiss psychiatrist and psychoanalyst Carl Jung called this area that we are afraid to look into and face, the “Shadow.” Jung created the term “collective unconscious” to describe everything we dislike admitting about ourselves. Jung believed that the average person would rather project his/her issues onto the world to place blame externally, rather than look inward and own those issues.


Whatever you see in others you have inside.


If you were really honest, you’d realize that much of whatever annoys you about another person or the world is a part of you deep inside, where you are often too scared and proud to face.


World-renowned thought leader and global teacher Dr. John DeMartini said:


You will never see a trait in somebody else that you don’t have. And if you’re judging it, it’s reminding you of something that you’re judging in yourself… Whatever you see in others you have inside.


This is a part of Jung’s collective unconscious in that the “collective” refers to everyone: all of us–to some extent–fear that we are not enough.


Humor Instead of Self Shame


So how can we overcome fear? It helps greatly to look at our fears objectively, with a sense of humor – we are all crazy! It’s okay! When we experience uncomfortable feelings, we tend to be hard on ourselves and hide under the fear.


Just think of how many times you had a terribly negative and/or embarrassing thought and how hard you were on yourself for having that thought…how did that work out for you?


All humans have the Shadow within. Yet once we acknowledge and face these feelings, the Shadow loses its power. There is nothing wrong with you for having certain feelings or thoughts, it just means that you got honest enough to face the primitive component of your mind.


Dr. David R. Hawkins made an astute comparison: “The unconscious is crude and uncivilized. When your intellect went to prep school, your unconscious remained in the jungle where it was still swinging through trees.”


What You Hold in Your Mind Tends to Manifest


When we constantly hold a negative thought in our mind, we give energy to it and there’s a compound effect element that grows and grows where all of a sudden our fears can become reality.


Don’t hold on to negative thoughts! Why pour energy into your fears and self judgement?  Instead, overcome fear and channel your energy into what matters most in your life!






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